Our relationship felt like the movie ‘Inception’ mixed with ‘He’s Just Not That Into You’ and ‘Fifty Shades of Grey, all gone horribly wrong.
It’s hard for us women to listen to our brain when deciding to get out of something so toxic like a bad relationship. Not only have we been manipulated by a stupid boy, but… we also battle heartache vs. gut feelings (our brain) and we battle every damn Disney fairy tale vs. reality.
It was hard for me to listen to my brain when who I thought was my soulmate, by nature, sought out his needs and cared for them over mine.
You could say I was the perfect toy to play with. I came with batteries included and my goal was to aim to please to make my consumer, him, happy.
However, once you listen to your brain, you’re able to take your heart back from him. You will be able to see things clearly. You will be able to see how much he underestimated the value you brought into the relationship.
Once you take your heart back, you will be able to see that when you’re with someone who’s an expert at gas lighting, it’s hard to not take the blame and it’s hard to see that your own intentions were pure.
Once you take your heart back and listen to your brain, it’s easy to see that you cannot waste your time on someone who is clearly so undeserving of the love you gave him. You are able to see that people like him don’t change. People like him are a waste of your time. No matter how many articles you read, the outcome will still be the same (he’s not the exception).
Once you take your heart back, fault and blame will never be two words that cross your mind as to why he never changed.
Once you take your heart back, you’ll realize those girls he always called ‘friends’ were just backups for when he felt you had failed.
Once you take your heart back, you’ll realize your self-worth.
I allowed my partner to place me on diets, to make fun of my eyes, to mimic the way I dressed, and the worst part was I let him treat me like a slave in the bedroom. I’m pretty sure if Christian Grey himself was an actual person, even he’d be disgusted by the way I was treated. But I allowed this because I loved him. I allowed this because I loved him with every cell in my body. I allowed this because I refused to listen to my brain. I placed all my logic and decision-making into my heart. I know I’m not the only woman who has been through this battle.
However, I grew wise to his games, and with time my heart grew cold toward him. It was like the worst possible winter inside my body. Once he was able to crush my heart, I knew I was the only person who could heal it and I knew it was time to listen to my brain and take back the crushed pieces—he had left me like broken glass on the floor.