Most of the people who find themselves in a relationship with an abuser refuse to believe that. They want to believe that their abuser loves them and cares for them. They often have all kinds of excuses for why they are being abused. It’s not just physical abuse. There is emotional abuse which is even worse. When you finally find the strength to walk out of an abusive relationship the society often wants proof that you were being abused. Rarely anyone will take your word for it. When we talk about emotional abuse that is not easy to prove. How can you prove that you have emotional scares? How can you prove that you just had enough of insults and yelling? There are no physical signs of abuse. Bear in mind that men and women abuse emotionally each other in the same rates. Men are not the only abusers in relationships.   When you are going through this you should find strength to leave that person that is causing you pain. These are some of the signs of emotional abuse, so if you recognize yourself, think hard and ask yourself: “Do I want to live my life in fear and suffering?”

Discouragement

Your partner is never there for you. He provides you with no support. When you are about to do something he discourages you. He may do this either because he thinks that you are unable to complete it or because he is just jealous. Either way, this is emotional abuse. Your partner should support you in anything that you do.

Domination and control

Do you feel like you have no saying in anything? That your voice is not being heard? It is ok to be a little bit dominant because every relationship has to have the person who is a bit more dominant than the other. That person will make sure that things are moving. But if your partner decides in everything on its own and doesn’t take your opinion into consideration, you are not on a good track. And also, your partner shouldn’t control everything and that includes you. You shouldn’t feel inferior to him, you must be equals.  

Making everything your fault

Are you afraid of doing something because you are not sure how your partner will react? Are you afraid that if it goes wrong he will blame you? Things shouldn’t work like that in a healthy relationship. When your partner wants to do something he or she should do it. And if it turns out to be not a good idea, you should discuss it and see where you did wrong. It’s not fair to blame the other person, it’s abuse.

Uses money to control you

If you aren’t working and you partner is, the way he behaves with the money will tell you everything. If he takes all the money like it’s just his or hers it means he is emotionally abusing you. Your partner uses money to make you do things you usually wouldn’t and to make you do things he or she wants you to do. That is just not right!

I love you, but…

Love shouldn’t be conditional. You love someone no matter what. You love them with flaws and all. So, when your partner says he loves you, but…it’s not a good sign. I know that there are many things that you want him or her to change but you still love them. They are abusing you and you love them. So how can that person say to you that he loves you, but…something is missing? They want you to change something. And each time there is something new to change.

Mean jokes

He is constantly making fun of you. He is making mean jokes at your expense. He does it in front of your friends and family but in a way that doesn’t come off as insulting. But you know it is. You shouldn’t permit anyone to make a mockery out of you. In any way. Ever. You are as valuable as that person thinks he or she is.  

Flirting in front of you

This person has no shame in flirting with the opposite sex. Whether you are there or not, it makes no difference to him or her. Sometimes these people do it even more when their partner is present just to show them that they are the ones in control and that they can do with their lives whatever they want and you are to sit there and be quiet.

Humiliation

You are in an abusive relationship if you partner humiliates you in front of others and in private. This kind of humiliation can be mocking but it can be talking to you in an offensive way or as if you were ignorant. It can be talking down on you to be sure you are left there way beneath them in an inferior position.

Lets everyone enter your private life

Your partner has no respect for your private life. He or she doesn’t hesitate in revealing your secrets and your deepest thoughts to a complete stranger just so he or she has something to talk about. Your privacy means nothing to him or her. These are all clear signs you are in an abusive relationship. NO ONE deserves to go through these things on a daily basis. Life is just one to live and you should find your courage and use it to decide on how you want your life to look like. Stand up for yourself and say: “NO, THAT’S ENOUGH!”