Love advice

Stop Falling In Love If He Stops Trying

They say that true love takes effort and that it demands sacrifices. You should fight for the one you love and be ready to overcome all obstacles life might throw at your feet.

After all, you’ve read all the fairytales. You know how both the Prince and the Princess fight the evil witches and don’t let anyone stand in the way of their romance.

And I couldn’t agree more: no relationship can become healthy overnight. Instead, it takes a lot of hard work, commitment, devotion, trust, and compromise to make things work.

Of course, most importantly—it takes a lot of love to build it right.

However, the truth is that sometimes, love isn’t enough, especially if it’s one-sided.

 

There is no point if you’re the only one trying, the only one pushing your relationship forward, and the only one worrying about its future.

Remember: every relationship is a two-way street, and all of your efforts are in vain if the other person isn’t ready to move his finger for the sake of your romance.

In this case scenario, you will burn out in a matter of time, while your partner will start taking you for granted and assume that you’ll always be there to prevent your relationship from going downhill.

So please, understand that fighting for love and chasing it are two different things. Giving your best and being the only one trying are not the same. 

No, you’re not asking for too much just because you want to have a mentally and emotionally present boyfriend who doesn’t consider his job to be done the moment he sees that you’ve fallen for him.

You’re not overdemanding for wanting a man who will spend the rest of his life in attempts to win you over with each day that comes.

You don’t have too high of a standard for expecting a gentleman who will forever court you—a real man who will never forget your worth and who will consider himself lucky for having a woman like you by his side.

No, it is not selfish to walk away from someone who stops putting effort around you; leaving a man who obviously couldn’t care less whether you’re around or not is an act of self-care, not a sign of ego-centrism.

 

All of this is a lot easier said than done, I know. However, it seems that you keep forgetting that you’re the ruler of your own emotions, not the other way around.

Yes, you have what it takes to order your heart to stop loving someone who doesn’t deserve it.

You have the capacity to stop giving your entire self, without receiving anything in return.  

Yes, you can—and have to—stop falling in love the moment you see that he isn’t trying to put a smile back on your face anymore or that he doesn’t care whether he is breaking your heart and how his actions are affecting you; the moment you see that this man wouldn’t do anything if you abandon him and that he would never chase you to come back.

You need to stop falling in love when he stops seducing you and putting effort into reminding you how butterflies feel each day; when he stops paying attention to the little things—when he starts forgetting your birthday or anniversary date, stops noticing that you have a new haircut, and stops caring when he sees that you’re sad.

It’s time to call it quits the moment you start feeling like his second choice.

The moment he puts everyone and everything in front of you, just because he’s certain that you’re not going anywhere.

It needs to happen when you see that he doesn’t appreciate you anymore; that he is taking you for granted and stops matching your sacrifices.

 

Stop falling in love when he stops being fully invested. 

Stop giving your entire self the moment you realize that this has become a one-sided relationship; when you start feeling more alone than you would if you were single and that this man is only officially your romantic partner. 

Stop falling in love when this relationship starts bringing you more sorrow than happiness; when you see that it burdens your thoughts and that it keeps on breaking your heart.

Back out when you see that it has a negative impact on your emotional and mental health; once you see that you’re losing yourself, in attempts to save the remains of this already failed relationship.

Stop falling in love with him the moment you see that he is about to fall out of love with you.

Yes, admitting to yourself that the man you thought was your soulmate is becoming indifferent to you is incredibly difficult, but trust me, it is way better to do it before it becomes too late.

Don’t be desperate, and don’t wait for all of his emotions to fade away. Don’t settle for crumbs, and don’t expect things to go back the way they used to be.

Instead, run for your life, without ever looking back.

Forget about blaming yourself and forget about second chances because the moment this man stopped trying was the moment he broke your relationship beyond repair. 

 

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