Relationship Advice: Why Men Love It When You Put Yourself First
Why do men like it when you put yourself first? We women, by our maternal nature, mistakenly believe that the more we care about a man and pay attention to him, the more he will care about us. And we start doing this from the very beginning of the relationship, especially if we really like the man: we make him the center of our universe, we begin to adjust all our plans to him, we put him first, convincing ourselves that he will do the same for us.
But this is how we usually push a man away unconsciously—sometimes thank God. The reason is obvious: a man feels pressure in the relationship and begins to resist your efforts to get closer. But there is something else going on that you may not notice, and it works against you.
Why Men Love It When You Put Yourself First. Taking care of yourself first is what is most attractive to a man.
A sensible man will not be interested in a woman who does not take care of herself. You can look as independent as you want—successful at work, a caring mother, a housewife—but a man sees when you do not care about your basic needs for rest, health, or just time for yourself.
A man sees when you are not making your life complete. And then he feels terrible pressure to fulfill your life. Whether you ask him to or not, he is waiting for a catch. He will take what you give him, but he will be waiting in fear for the moment when you ask for a return.
These are the first seeds of relationship dissatisfaction. When you put a man first, something inevitably moves to second place—and that is you. If you don’t take care of yourself, you will either push your man away or desensitize him to your needs and feelings.
Yes, he won’t take care of you as much as you do him. He’ll think that because you don’t take care of yourself, your needs aren’t that important.
Over time, you will start to get angry, and it will show in your relationship with him.
When you give and give to someone without feeling reciprocated, that resentment builds up and eventually eats away at your feelings for them without you even realizing it. You’re not just mad at them for neglecting you. You’re actually mad at yourself for not thinking about yourself first in the first place.
A man will treat you the way you treat yourself, so the best way to get a man to treat you better is to start taking better care of yourself.
What does it look like?
You should do what you enjoy. It could be just going to the movies, cooking, taking a hot bath with foam and essential oils, spending an hour with your favorite book, traveling, meeting with friends, or taking time for yourself.
Just stop thinking that time when you don’t have to do anything is useless and meaningless.
A woman who takes care of herself has healthy self-esteem and makes a man continue to make her happy. Once you start putting yourself first, you will notice how your relationship with your man changes.
You will see him look at you a little differently. When he realizes that your happiness does not depend on him, he will stop feeling pressured and will naturally become closer and treat you better.
