Relationship advice

8 Important Things You Should Know Before Dating A Single Mom

Single moms are true heroes. They sacrifice all they have to raise their kids in the best possible way and they never regret it. They are devoted, loving, caring and brave. But they also need someone to show them that they are not alone. They need a man who will be good enough to win the heart of a single mom. And a man who tries to win the heart of a single mom needs to know a few important things.

1. You will never be her priority since her children already are

If you date a single mom, you need to know that you will never be the most important person in her life. She has little people she has to take care of and they will always be her top priority. She has those who were there before you and she won’t let you take their place. She will always put them first and if you can live with that, then you are a perfect candidate to win the heart of a single mom. But if you compete with her kids for her attention, you better give up in time because you lost a long time ago.

2. You need to be good with her kids

No single mom would ever put up with a man who isn’t good to her kids. That’s why you need to respect her kids because they are her everything. She lives for them and she would never let anyone hurt them. When you start dating her, you should be careful how you behave in front of them. Don’t ever let them feel like you will replace their dad because you can never do that. But instead, make them feel like you are just a friend who will spend more time with their mom and them of course. When she sees that you are loving and caring with her kids, she will accept you completely.  

3. Don’t try to play any games with her

The truth is that you really can’t play any mind games with a single mom. She has been through so much in her life and the last thing she needs right now is another kid she needs to raise. She needs an emotionally stable man to be her support when she can’t do it anymore. She needs someone who will be open about his feelings. A man who will say if he wants something and not make her have to guess about anything. So, whatever you do, don’t play any games because she is sick and tired of them. She only likes those games she plays with her kids and nothing else.

4. You need to know that her ex will always be a part of her life

Even if she is divorced there is something that will connect her to her ex for the rest of her life—her kids. You need to know that he will be around all the time because they need to talk about their kids and find ways to raise them in a normal way. So, if you can accept the fact that another man will always be there and that you also need to respect him, then you have a chance with her. Otherwise, it really doesn’t make any sense.

5. She is busy but really busy

A single mom has a job (or two) and kids she needs to take care of. Also, every day she needs to cook meals for her family and do all the household chores. And there is nobody to help her. So, you should understand her when she says that she is too tired to go out and that she would rather spend an evening with her kids. You shouldn’t judge her for not focusing on you since she has others who need her more than you. And that is completely normal. That’s why you need to organize and plan dates with her so she can spend enough time with her kids but devote time to you as well.  

6. She doesn’t need you to save her

A single mom knows what her life looks like and she is okay with that. She doesn’t feel sorry for herself so you shouldn’t feel sorry for her. She doesn’t want pity. She just wants someone who will be there to hug her when she is down. Someone who will tell her that she is doing an amazing job and that her kids are so lucky to have her as a mom. She is the one who kisses and hugs her kids and from time to time she needs someone who will hug her and tell her they love her. That’s all she wants, normal communication and a normal life.  

7. Don’t push things

When you date a single mom, you need to be extra careful because her life is not easy and you need to keep that in mind. No matter how much she would want to do things that make her happy she can’t because of her kids. But she has accepted this as totally normal and she is okay with that. So, don’t push things because it is already hard enough for her. I know that you want to have her only for yourself for a couple of hours but that won’t be possible because there are little people in her life who are her priority. So, forget about sleeping over because her kids would find that weird. Wait until they get to know you better and then try to be their friend so they can start believing your good intentions. Only then can you slowly enter into their lives. Only then will they know they are safe with you and that you just want them to be happy.  

8. There is so much love inside her

The truth is that there is so much love inside a single mom. She can love you in ways you didn’t know existed and she is willing to give all of herself to the right man. A woman like this has been through hell and back and she just wants someone who will love her without playing any games. She needs a man who will give her all that she craves and who will never give up on her. There is so much love and affection in her and she is so good at giving it to the people she loves. She is affectionate with her kids who are her whole world and she loves being their mom and taking care of them but she also needs someone who will remind her how special she is. Christine is the author of ‘Staring Into The Eyes Of Anxiety And Depression’, a book that will change the way you fight anxiety and depression.  

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