One day you will realize that you miss me. You will realize that you miss the way I used to make you feel. You will miss morning rituals with me. You will miss dancing around the house whenever Elvis hits. You will miss weekend trips we had, late night guilty pleasures and eating cookie dough off of my body. You will miss everything about me, but it will be too late.
One day you will realize that no one will make you a priority like I did. You will realize that no one will be ready to give up parts of themselves to keep you happy. No one will support you the way I did, no one will be there when you call them because you’re not there for them. You receive what you give and you honey, gave nothing at all. No one will be crazy enough to give themselves to you, to gain nothing but pain.
One day you will finally see my worth. You will finally see me the way I now see myself. You will see what an amazing woman you let go because of your stupidity. You will realize why leaving you was the best thing I ever did for myself. You will see that it was never about me being needy—it was about you being selfish. I never asked for all of your time. I never asked you to give up on parts of yourself for me. I never asked you to give me more than you can. All I ever wanted was to feel loved and to feel like you’re happy to make me your choice. But I never did and I never was.
One day you will finally see that I’m not a scared little girl anymore. You will see that I never had to settle for your love—I did it because I wanted to. I never had to put up with your shitty behavior, but I did it because I loved you. I wanted you, all of you. I wanted your moody days, your past and your future. I wanted to lose myself in your arms and drown myself in your love. I never needed any of it, and that’s what’s killing you. I never needed you to know that I’m amazing. But you needed me.
One day you will realize that no one loved you the way I did. One day you will realize that you traded my love for a taste of freedom. You traded my love for one-night stands and hookups. You traded the real thing for shallow relationships with random girls at random bars. And someday, you will want me back. You will want to feel loved again, but I won’t be there. When I gave you everything, you gave up on me. Now it’s my turn to give up on you.
One day you will realize that I was worth the fight. You will realize that one night with me was worth thousands of others. You will realize that my love was worth fighting for. That I was worth committing to, but it will be too late. The moment you stepped outside of my life, it was too late. The moment you decided that you love yourself more than us, it was too late. The moment you left me for other women, it was too late. The moment you choose yourself over me, it was too late.
Because, you see, I’m finally done giving all of me to gain nothing in return. I’m done being anyone’s last resort because I know that I deserve to be the priority. I deserve to be someone’s only choice, not an option. I deserve to feel like the only woman in the world. I deserve to get that kind of love I once gave you. And I deserve someone who will see the fire in my eyes and wants to play with it. Someone who will look at me and wonder how could I ever think that I’m not enough.
