Fifth Date: 7 Things You Should Be Looking For By This Point
Whether it’s the fifth date, third date or second date, one thing is non-negotiable; there has to be some sort of connection! If there is no vibe and no spark between you two, you’re probably wasting your time.
It goes without saying that you can’t tell whether this person is your soulmate by the fifth date, but you can tell if there’s potential!
So if by, let’s say, your fourth date, you’re feeling zero sparks, take it as a red flag and end it before you waste any more of your time.
If the person is coming on too strong or if you’re not feeling comfortable and you are forcing yourself to go on the sixth date, it’s not worth the bother; even if it’s as early as the first date.
If it feels unnatural, forced or awkward, just leave!
But if you’re past the fifth date stage and you’re feeling good about the whole thing, then by all means, keep at it! As long as the vibe is right and the person is making you feel good about yourself, you’re on the right track.
There is no way to know for certain whether this will turn into a serious relationship by the 5th date, but if you’re both enjoying your time together and you spend a lot of time laughing, there is definitely potential of taking it to the next level.
Fifth Date Necessities – What To Expect
Okay, so you’re officially at the fifth date stage. At this point, the stakes are a little higher and expectations are slowly growing.
Now, you can start seeing this person as your love interest as opposed to someone you’re bound to break up with and vice versa.
Normally, you hear a lot of talk about the importance of the third date. But here’s why I put emphasis on the 5th date.
The third date is all about sex. There is so much pressure surrounding that particular date that it literally makes me feel like this is my first time dating.
Is sex on the table? Is it off the table? Is the guy thinking the same thing? Am I making myself too paranoid? Should I just go back to online dating?
Not to mention that if the sex happened, now you’re left wondering whether the person still wants to keep seeing you or if it was all about the sex. That’s why I’m putting greater importance on the fifth date.
If you’ve survived the slight awkwardness of the first date, successfully ended the second date and managed to get past the weirdness surrounding the third date, you’re (almost) in the clear!
By now, there are certain things you and your potential love interest should be on the same page on. You should both be aiming toward a committed relationship and have comfortable, fun and relaxing small talk.
The dates should be getting more and more fun now, as well as meaningful and with a sense of a deeper purpose. Each following date should be more relaxed and comfortable.
These are just some of the many other things you should be looking for by the 5th date! Let’s check what else you should definitely be expecting by this point.
What Should You Look For?
Finally, we’re getting to the good part. Right now, there are certain things you should definitely be on the lookout for.
Never ignore the warning signs and always feel entitled to ask for these 7 things once you’re past the fifth date.
If you’re hoping for a serious relationship, these are the boxes that need to be checked:
1. You should be comfortable letting your guard down
Naturally, on the first couple of dates (especially the first date), you’re going to make it a point to put your best foot forward and leave the best first impression. We all do.
You don’t want to show any shortcomings so you emphasize all the good while leaving all the bad for later.
But if you are aiming to have a serious relationship, at some point, you’re going to have to feel comfortable letting your guard down.
By the fifth date, you should feel comfortable not always being perfect in front of them. That includes having conversations about deeper stuff and possibly sharing things that aren’t that peachy.
If you want to get to know this person properly, you need to be ready to share more than just the good stuff. That means opening up and being genuine, all the while knowing that they’re not going anywhere.
If you can’t let your guard down by the fifth date, that says everything you need to know. I love a cute guy and a fun convo just like any other gal but if I can’t share myself in entirety, what’s the point?
2. They need to be fun
We all have our own idea of what fun means but the point is not to let someone who’s a total snoozefest keep you hoping for more when you know that they’re a lost cause!
You deserve a little fun in your life. You deserve to find someone who’ll make you genuinely laugh every now and again.
Chances are if they still haven’t made you truly laugh by the first couple of dates, it’s not going to happen!
Don’t let it go past longer than the fifth date if you’re not feeling the vibe.
Laughter is one of the key ingredients for a happy life and you’re entitled to someone who will constantly amuse you with their wicked sense of humor!
The spark doesn’t last forever. And that’s precisely why there needs to be a genuine connection and the ability to make each other laugh.
What will happen once you stop being wildly attracted to them after many years go by?
If there’s nothing making you stay after the initial lust wears down, you’re not really a match made in heaven.
3. They shouldn’t be coming on too strong
There should definitely be a line that your date shouldn’t cross as early as the 5th date. It’s okay to start opening up and sharing things but coming on too strong is a major turn-off.
There is a time and place for everything. You should look for a partner who will take things slowly and gradually.
Somebody who won’t overwhelm you with their deepest fears on the second date and tell you all about their messed-up family issues by the fifth date.
Once (if ever) you get to the point of a committed relationship, then it’s okay to delve deeper into your intimacy and share the things that make you feel exposed and vulnerable.
As for the fifth date, look for someone who’s chill and relaxed.
A person who doesn’t make you want to get up and run for your life but rather smile and enjoy the pleasant conversation that has the potential to turn into something deeper.
4. The conversation should be flowing
On the first couple of dates, the conversation is usually a bit more forced and rehearsed. It takes time before you truly get comfortable enough to let it flow as opposed to always filling the awkward silences.
And for the second date (or even the third date), that’s quite normal. But when you get to the fifth date, the conversation should be becoming a little more natural and much less scripted.
If you’re still finding yourself wondering what you’re going to say next every time you’re done speaking, it’s a warning sign that you’re not with the right person.
Getting to the 5th date means that there’s something keeping you there. If it’s not quality conversation, what is it?
Never allow yourself to keep having scripted convos with anyone. Sometimes, it’s just not meant to be!
The conversation should be light, fun, natural and comfortable by the fifth date. If it’s not, you’re probably wasting your time.
5. There should be mutual interests
As you’re progressing, there have to be some shared interests that will keep you connected. It can be anything from the kind of music you both like to adventurous hobbies or cooking classes.
As long as it’s something that you’re both passionate about, it’s enough to sustain a budding romance.
Clearly, you don’t have to feel the same way about every single thing but there has to be something that glues you together.
If you want to start a serious relationship, you need something to base it on. It’s vital to find common ground. If you don’t, it will catch up with you at some point.
You should always stay true to yourself and not change who you are for anybody. If you keep forcing something that isn’t there, it’ll make you miserable later on.
Lust only takes you so far. A genuine connection is what propels relationships to move forward.
6. They should be grounded
The last thing you want is to be dating an arrogant know-it-all. They need to have humility. They need to be able to face their own shortcomings and be honest about who they are.
If you enter a serious relationship, conflict is inevitable to occur, which is why being humble and self-aware is crucial.
If they can’t admit when they’re wrong, how will you ever achieve an agreement on anything?
It’s true that you can’t really know for sure how grounded this person is by the fifth date but you can get a pretty good sense of how humble or egocentric they are.
The moment you start seeing red flags of a person who feels entitled or above you, run. You are looking for your equal, not someone who’ll keep making you feel small.
The fifth date is the perfect time to reevaluate where you are and how far you’re willing to let this go.
Trust your gut. If you’re sensing even the slightest signs of arrogance or pompousness, it’s time to let them go.
7. There should be shared values
For any serious relationship to truly stand the test of time, there have to be shared values.
By the fifth date, you probably won’t have discussed this topic thoroughly (there’s a time and a place for everything) but through conversation, you should get the gist of what they stand for.
If you sense that there are huge discrepancies in your values, trust your gut feeling. The worst thing you can do is brush off something as crucial as this.
By the fifth date, you will be able to tell if this person has the potential of being compatible with you values-wise. If that feels highly unlikely, that’s a huge problem waiting to happen.
You can ignore it now and think that it will all work out or you can be honest about what you’re looking for in a partner and admit when things go south. You deserve the full package, not someone you’re half-compatible with.
Your values are what make you who you are. Don’t ignore the warning signs of an impending disaster. Break up if things aren’t to your liking and if you feel like you’re on the same page, good luck with the sixth date.
Things might just work out for you two!
Your gut feeling will tell you everything you need to know before this person even gets the chance to. Listen to it!
The fifth date means you’re making good progress. Make sure it stays that way by never budging on the important things. You should never compromise who you are for the sake of a date.
You should never agree to let a cute person bore you to death just because you think you’d have gorgeous kids.
Life’s too short to be bored! Find a like-minded soul! Go for the one who cracks you up in the most unexpected situations!
Go on the sixth date only if there’s a genuine bond, good conversation and a light, comfortable atmosphere. Anything else, count your losses and go home.
There are plenty more fish in the sea if this person doesn’t check all of the aforementioned boxes.
Once you feel it in your bones, you won’t need anyone to tell you if there’s potential. You’ll just know!
Let the fifth date be your do-or-die. Are all of the boxes checked? Awesome, proceed to the sixth date! But if they’re not, go find someone who’ll never make you question your compatibility for one second.
Life’s so much more beautiful with someone who just gets you!