8 Reasons To Get Back With Your Ex That Are Legit
Have you ever broken up with someone only to reunite? People often say it’s doomed, but it’s not that clear-cut. A study in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships reports around one-third of people living together reconcile after a breakup. Overall, around 50% of younger adults who break up will reunite. Some of these reunions work, while others fall apart.
If you’re wondering, “Should I get back with my ex?” there are a few things to consider, starting with the reasons you broke up.
1. You still had some growing, learning, exploring, and self-discovery to do
You should get back together if you’ve used your time apart to do the growth, learning, and self-discovery you needed.
2. You were in a time of transition with your career
Career woman thinks about getting back with exinsta_photos via Shutterstock
This meant leaving little time or energy to focus on the relationship.
Relationship coach Deborah Roth explained, “Even with the best intentions and a passionate commitment to creating a healthy work-life rhythm, there will be days when everything just all falls apart. The perfect storm happens when both you and your partner have bad days and you haven’t had a chance to really connect in a while.”
3. You didn’t realize what you had
Most people fall under this reason along with how much you loved them until they were gone.
4. You weren’t ready for something so real, intense, and consuming
You simply weren’t ready for the real deal. At least not yet.
5. You were still emotionally tied to an unhealthy ex
You weren’t ready to open your heart to someone else yet, even though your ex was awful and the person in front of you was pretty great.
A study in the Journal of Social Psychology found “an increased chance of [relationship] renewals was all related to uncertainty about what the preceding breakup indicated, not having dated others after breakups, and feeling the on-off nature improved the relationship.”
6. You met while you were with someone else
Though you thought you were ready when you finally got together, the fact is you still had some serious healing to do. You simply weren’t in a healthy place to pursue this new relationship.
Regardless of how “right” they were for you in general, the timing was wrong.
7. You tried imposing a timeframe on the relationship
You were ready for a proposal, marriage, and kids, but they weren’t ready to move at your speed. So, you were more interested in finding someone else who was on your schedule.
8. You had some issues you needed to come to terms with and heal from
You have taken the time apart to heal and come to terms with issues you may have had before or during the relationship.
