Do you spend time exclusively with your partner? Do they check your phone every day? Are they jealous of your friends? If so, you may have a possessive boyfriend (or girlfriend) with serious boundary issues.
In the early stages of a relationship, we usually feel good when our partner is protective and possessive. It is flattering and exciting. We feel valued, that our partner belongs to us, and that we belong to them. When this sense of belonging is balanced with independence and individuality, we can build healthy and long-lasting relationships.
However, when this possessiveness is rooted in fear, insecurity, and jealousy, it can quickly turn into a toxic relationship. When you feel controlled, stifled by the relationship or even abused.
Ownership is not attractive.
There is a big difference between being in a relationship and being obsessed with your partner. This can be a very difficult concept for most of us, as all possessive relationships start as the most romantic fairy tale. You feel like you have finally found that one person who loves you and cares about you.
The intensity, passion, and feel-good factor in the relationship consumes you and clouds your judgment. As a result, you ignore and overlook the warning signs that you may have a possessive boyfriend or girlfriend.
But then, gradually, the feeling of being suffocated and trapped begins to creep up on you. As you begin to notice your partner’s controlling behavior, you realize that you have been controlled and manipulated. Now you feel lost and confused, unable to find a safer place and a healthier relationship.
Why a Powerful partner is dangerous
At what point does innocent possessiveness become aggressive abuse? When do you know you’ve had enough? When you experience this behavior, it can lead to intense feelings of anxiety, hopelessness, unhappiness, and depression. As well as low self-esteem, anger, stress, and psychological, physical, and emotional abuse.
If left unchecked, your partner can be very dangerous. When such people feel threatened or challenged, or if they are afraid of losing you, they can become aggressive.
