Relationship Advice: A Woman You Don’t Love… How Is This Possible And Why Is It Necessary?

A woman you don’t love… How is that, and why is it necessary? Living with a woman you don’t love is much more comfortable, calmer, and easier than with the one you’re burning with all the colors of the rainbow for.  All the whims of the unloved one don’t bother you much.  If she wants cherry juice at night, you calmly go to the kitchen and pour the mineral water you have there into a glass with your conscience completely asleep.

You don’t feel guilty when, instead of listening to her story about what happened at work, you listen to the news on TV behind her back.

Her grievances hardly affect you, and as a result, she has to be the first to blame and make peace. After all, it is not the one who is guilty who always seeks reconciliation, but the one whose feelings hurt more. And this, again, only strengthens your position as the “sovereign” in the relationship.

You are not afraid of losing her and immediately become stronger, not depending on your common future. Which again gives you power over a woman, because her freedom is her weapon, the ghost of which easily puts many men at attention.

You are not disappointed. 

Her failures, mistakes, and awkwardness don’t bother you much. It’s her life. Of course, if she asks for help, you’ll help. But if she fails her GITIS exams for the third time, you won’t be upset—she’ll pay more attention to the house.

You are not jealous. 

If someone shows her signs of attention, then you just coldly observe her behavior, “examining” her morality. And woe to her if she does not pass it or does not pass it confidently enough—”being”jealous” with a cool head, managing anger—an exquisite art and pleasure.

Your relationship is a strange mixture of friendship with your sister and a love affair between a pensioner and a hooker. You are comfortable together, you always have something to talk about, and you rarely quarrel. And when it comes to bed, everything is ordinary and calm, though a little utilitarian, and from time to time.

But the “infrequency” of intimacy in such cases is only comfortable. There is still no great attraction, and you have long since stopped expecting anything from sex except your dose of purely physiological “high.”.

You can live like this for years. 

But sometimes you suddenly get a feeling of meaninglessness and a dead end that squeezes your throat.

Was my whole life really for this!? 

And looking into her eyes, I want to scream with all my might—stop! What are you doing? Go away; don’t waste your life on me! She’s not worth it. I’m not bad, I’m not evil, I’m not your enemy, but I just don’t love you! I’m not yours!.. 

But there is no horror in her eyes; she does not hear your scream; she believes you. And you are silent.  Living with an unloved woman is comfortable and calm. “Love me, love my umbrella!”