Love advice

If He’s Hurting You, Stop Chasing Him

If he’s been toying with you, making you think he’s interested one day and then completely changing his tune the next day, then stop chasing after him.

If he’s been sending mixed signals that have been messing with your self-esteem and making you feel self-conscious, then stop chasing after him.

If he’s the reason you’ve been crying into pillowcases and insulting yourself in the mirror, then stop chasing after him.

You can’t control your feelings — but you can control your behaviors. You can’t stop yourself from thinking about him — but you can stop yourself from texting him. You can stop yourself from accepting his shitty treatment. You can stop yourself from forming a deeper bond with him when you already know it’s only going to end in heartbreak.

 

If you’ve been complaining to your friends about him nonstop, then stop chasing after him.

If you’ve been more frustrated with him lately than infatuated with him, then stop chasing after him.

If you’re concerned he’s never going to start treating you better, then stop chasing after him.

Sure, there’s always a chance he’s going to change his tune sometime soon, but you shouldn’t keep chasing after him based on predictions and hopes you have for the future. You have to look at the way he’s treating you right now. You have to look at his past patterns and ask yourself whether or not he has risen to your standards. Ask yourself whether or not you’re interested in dealing with the same nonsense in the future.

You need to stop thinking about how badly you want to be with him and start thinking about how badly you want to feel loved, respected, appreciated, accepted. He might not be the one to bring you those comforts. He might not be able to give you everything you’ve been hoping to have. He might not be your answer.

 

Even though it’s important to chase after what you want, you shouldn’t need to beg for his attention. You shouldn’t need to list out reasons he should pay attention to you. He should be drawn to you naturally. He should want to spend more time with you, want to text you, not feel pressured into it.

You don’t want to place yourself in a position where you’re the only one putting in any sort of effort. You don’t want to set yourself up for heartbreak. After all, it isn’t your responsibility to make him see what’s so great about you. To the right person, your beauty will be startlingly obvious. They will see it right away.

If it seems like the amount you care is significantly greater than the amount he cares, then stop chasing after him.

If you feel like you’re the only one willing to put effort into getting to know each other better, then stop chasing after him.

If you’ve mostly been miserable dealing with him, then stop chasing after him. Find someone it doesn’t hurt to love. Someone who makes you feel wanted, not discarded.

 

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