Love Advice: What All Smart Women Do Before Starting A New Relationship
You are a smart woman, aren’t you?
You’ve already had a few dates, and everything went great. You’re already thinking about officially becoming his girlfriend, but you’re still hesitant.
Maybe you got burned badly in a past relationship, or maybe you’ve been single for a long time. Maybe your exes were all jerks, or you’ve just had bad luck. Any negative experience is holding you back from letting a new potential relationship blossom. And that’s because you don’t know how to start it off right this time. You’re thinking, What if you’re not right for each other? What if he sleeps all over the bed? What if his parents won’t like me? You’re overthinking yourself and ruining a relationship that hasn’t even really started yet! Take a deep breath. If you’ve met a nice guy and you think it could work out, there are a few things you should know before you give the green light. And that starts with making sure you’re being honest with yourself. Because no woman should change who she is for a man, even if he’s her prince charming. You’re a smart woman, right?
1. Understand that your past relationships do not determine your future ones.
Whatever went wrong in the past doesn’t mean it will happen again. Your ex cheated on you, but that doesn’t mean a new potential boyfriend will do the same. You have to understand that these are two different people; they have different personalities and different behaviors. Don’t be prejudiced against all men now and immediately suspect and blame them.
Plus, we learn from past relationships. And if you’ve started to suspect your new boyfriend of cheating, you should already know how to do everything right this time to save yourself from pain. Think of a new relationship as a fresh start.
2. Always maintain your independence.
Relationships should not be the only source of your happiness. Put yourself first; figure out what you enjoy doing more—riding a bike, reading, doing yoga—something that does not depend on anyone else.
Yes, relationships involve putting others before yourself, but sometimes you still have the right to be selfish. Don’t forget what makes you happy. Be selfish for yourself and selfless for your significant other.
3. Remember that being alone is not a punishment.
It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. And honestly, being single is a lot better than dating random people and not being happy, being in a relationship just to not be single.
When you’re dating someone, there are no guarantees. But if you don’t feel anything, don’t keep going. It’s unfair to them and unfair to yourself. Don’t be afraid to go solo again.
4. Don’t get hung up on the little things.
If you focus on the little habits a guy has that annoy you, you’ll never see if you have a deeper connection. Everyone has things that others don’t like about them. But if the way he brushes his teeth and rinses his mouth loudly drives you crazy, the problem is you, not him. Focus on the bigger picture.
5. Love yourself.
Yes, it has been written about a hundred times, but all because it is true. If you do not love yourself, do not respect, and do not appreciate, then if a certain guy appears next to you, there is a high chance that he will treat you the same way as you treat yourself—not appreciate and do not respect.
You have to love yourself, know your worth, know what you deserve, and not settle for less. All this means that before you start a new relationship, you have to take time for yourself.
