Despite my devastation and heartbreak, I want to thank you. I want to sincerely thank you from the bottom of my soul. You have now set me free from all the subsequent lies and restless nights I had to endure. No more am I having to subject myself to those endless nights of emotional torture you both put me through. No more will I let the sadness that you two caused echo upon my mind. No more am I having to look at my reflection through the puddle of tears and question where he is. I know exactly where he is, and that is with you.
This person who you think you’ll be able to trust and spend the rest of your life with will be impossible. Impossible because the two of you built the fundamental blocks of your relationship on nothing but trickery and deception. Don’t get me wrong, it takes two to tango. The amount of rage I have for you is triple for him and you both disgust me equally.
I’m disgusted because you knew exactly who I was. You looked me in the eye every Tuesday in your spin class, encouraging me to push harder. All the while, when I was taking my shower alone after class, you were the one showering yourself upon him.
I would love nothing more than to put your name on blast and be as basic as it comes when saying you two both deserve each other. However, that’s the thing about selfish people. Selfish people don’t care how they get there or who they trample on in mud—as long as they get there, it doesn’t matter how. Selfish people like you have no remorse for what you have done, and selfish people like you do not lose sleep at night when thinking about your wrongdoings.
However, selfish people will feel hurt when the same amount of pain they caused others deflects onto them. You, my dear, are his next victim and for that, I feel sorry for you.
You, my dear, are foolish to think he will not do the same to you. It will be the same old song for him. When he is high from the sick games he plays, it is over with you. Other women will be there to enter the scene. That’s the thing with narcissistic men. Once he is done stripping you of all your happiness, he will find another woman. Once he can groom you into the perfect model he wants, he can equally destroy you—he did with me and he will do that with you.
It won’t take long for you to be placed into the same category that he has placed me and all his exes. The same category in which I now lie. Your once-shared special memories of the perfect euphoria you both created will now be replaced by his new gal because ‘her—your’ jealousy was too much to bear. You, my dear, will enter that ‘crazy ex’ category. You’ll leave him but one choice and that will be to find another.
I’m not stupid sweetheart, I know that’s exactly what he told you about me. I know because he made me listen to his guilty conscience when I asked him why the rest of his perfect relationships seemed to fail and end abruptly.
However, after all the heartache you caused, after all the mess you created, I do not hate you. I know he would want me to hate you or be jealous of you, however, I feel sorry for you. I feel sorry because you’ll now have to endure a future with this emotional psychopath. You will now have to justify yourself as to why you are now the crazy one. I feel sorry for you that in a world full of women empowering other women, you are the one who’s alone.
What I wish for you, I wish that this one painful lesson learned will never be repeated in your life. I wish that you understand actions have consequences and like the law of karma, what goes around comes around. I wish for you that your heartache will never be as painful as mine. What I wish for you is that you’ll learn to enjoy your freedom after all is said and done. I wish you never have to slowly die inside like I did. What I wish for you is that you find true love, true love that isn’t built on lies or deception.
The broken-hearted mess you created.