9 Signs He’s Trying to Manipulate You!
Wanting the best in people is commendable, but not everyone has good intentions. Many people only care about themselves and will do and say anything to get what they want. Even when you think you’re in a solid relationship, some guys will try to manipulate you and take advantage of you. Here are the signs to look out for.
9 Signs He’s Trying to Manipulate You
1. You feel guilty all the time.
As you get deeper into a relationship and start getting to know someone, that person will learn what makes you feel bad. Some guys will use this knowledge to get their way this way. They make you feel guilty all the time so that you never even think about saying no to him. This way, he takes away your agency.
2. His problems are always bigger than yours.
We all need to talk to our partners from time to time and discuss our problems and troubles, but a manipulator will always pretend that his problems are worse than yours. No matter what you say, he will always find a way to turn everything so that he is supposedly going through big difficulties, and only this needs to be paid attention to. And everything that concerns you is the little things in life.
These guys are trying to make you think that your problems are not as serious and do not matter as much as theirs. So, they do not have to listen to your problems and focus all their attention on them.
3. He’s always “just kidding.”
Some guys try to use the phrase “just kidding” as a get-out-of-jail-free card. If they say something insensitive or something you don’t like, they try to make it up to you by saying, “I was just kidding.”
They try to minimize what they just said so you won’t get mad about it. And you end up being clueless and not getting his joke. That way, you’ll have the problem, not him. It’s kind of a catch and a subtle form of manipulation. If your boyfriend does this to you, run.
4. He does everything only on his terms.
This doesn’t sound super manipulative, but it can be. Some guys insist on doing things only on their terms. They only want to meet at their place, only go on dates to places they prefer, etc.
They don’t want to do what you want or spend time with your friends. This doesn’t seem like a big deal, but when it happens often, it’s one of the ways a guy manipulates to control the relationship.
5. He makes empty threats.
This is one of the oldest chapters in the book on manipulation. It may sound like a threat to do something you don’t want. It may also be a threat to end the relationship with you. Or even something more sinister. If this happens regularly, it’s a sign that he’s trying to manipulate you through fear, and you need to get out ASAP.
6. Tries to evoke sympathy
One of the common ways a guy might manipulate you to get his way is to make you feel sorry for him. He will usually find a way to portray himself as a victim in any situation. This means that he tries to never take responsibility and blame on himself. Instead, he will say anything he can to make himself look like a poor and unfortunate victim of circumstances.
7. He targets your insecurities
Just as guys learn how to make you feel guilty, they also understand your insecurities as you get deeper into the relationship. While most guys are okay with your insecurities, some use them against you. He may use them to manipulate you.
8. Shows excessive need for you
Oddly enough, a lot of guys complain about women being too needy and clingy. But like many things in relationships, it can be the other way around. Some guys tend to come across as overly needy, sometimes using it as a tool of manipulation. They will claim that they need your help when they know you are busy. Sometimes they will say that they are too caught up in their problems to help you when you need it.
9. He is too cute.
Unfortunately, when he is too nice, it can be a sign of subtle manipulation. Honestly, a lot of nice guys you meet are just naturally nice people. Try not to be suspicious of them right away. That being said, some of them are only nice because they want something in return.
Instead of being nice because they care about you, they will make it seem like you owe them something in exchange for their kindness. It’s all so confusing.