1. Accept that he has gone
The very first thing you need to do is accept that he has gone and that he is not coming back. If he wanted to be with you, he would have stayed with you and he would have solved the problems you two had. But he obviously decided to give up on you and everything you two had.
And that is something you should never forget. Nor forgive. Once you accept he is not a part of your life anymore, it will be easier to start a new chapter of your life.
2. Give yourself time to heal
When someone you love walks away, you need some time to heal and to get back on your feet again. That’s why you shouldn’t rush anything because there is plenty of time to do whatever you want. If you feel like crying then cry. If you feel like screaming then scream.
But don’t bottle up those emotions. Let everything toxic get out and once that happens, you will be able to start things over. Once you give yourself enough time to heal, you will get over the one who left you and who never looked back.
3. Learn from your mistakes
Relationships are a two-way street and you can’t blame only one person for the things that happened. That’s why you need to accept the fact that maybe you made some mistakes in that relationship. Maybe you kept giving him second chances and he never deserved them.
Maybe you put him first and you were never a priority to him. All those things were mistakes but you thought that you were doing the right thing back then. And that is what you need to work on. You need to correct your mistakes. You need to learn to respect yourself so that other people will respect you.
4. Focus on yourself instead
Instead of thinking about him all the time, you should focus on yourself and on your life. You are finally free to do whatever you want. You don’t need anyone to tell you what to do or how you will act in certain situations. You are a free woman now and your life is in your hands again.
So, leave him where he belongs and focus on the things that are important to you. For once in your life, put yourself first and don’t feel bad about that. And remember, that is not selfish. It is necessary.
5. Open your heart for new love
The worst thing you can do is close your heart and to put giant walls up. Just because one man was bad doesn’t mean that all of them will be like that. So, don’t close your heart because you can find love where you don’t think you will find it.
Don’t ever stop smiling because you never know when someone will fall in love with that beautiful smile. Always keep your heart open because that is good for you. Don’t close it because you can lose so many amazing things by doing that.
6. Learn to be positive no matter what
I know heartbreak can shake your whole world but that is not a reason to be negative all the time. You have a right to grieve and to go throughout the healing process but when that ends, bring the old you back. It will be good for you and for the people around you as well.
If you smile at life, life will smile at you and maybe bring some positive people to you. And when you see that life is beautiful and that you shouldn’t be crying over a man who didn’t know to cherish you, you will see that everything comes together.
7. Learn to put yourself first
One of the most important things you need to do when you realize he is not coming back is to put yourself first. It has been a while since you did that and now is the right time to do it.
You focused too much on a man who didn’t give a damn about you and now is the time to forget all about it and to start living your life to the fullest. Once you learn to put yourself first, you will see the changes you wanted in your life so much and every new thing you do will finally make sense.
Christine is the author of ‘Staring Into The Eyes Of Anxiety And Depression’, a book that will change the way you fight anxiety and depression.